to hair or not to hair

i forgot to tell the story of my day yesterday   actually just a moment when i laughed at myself   i recently got a hair cut and have been thinking it was too short   some of my hair cuts look like GI hair cuts and this is one of them   in my early 30s i got rebellious and radical with cutting my hair very short   length on top, but buzzed on the bottom half    i love it like this   so here i am wearing it again    lately though i've been thinking i no longer desire to wear it this way but with a tadbit more length   anyways, so i ask Cindy if it was too short and her reply was no it looks good   i know Tjnya definitely doesn't like it this way   mostly i don't desire to appear as a 'Butch' which depending on one's perspective i do  ...anyhow, i go to Fed Ex yesterday to pick up a package   the first thing i see is a woman with a Mohawk   i start laughing at myself about worrying about my short hair   her mohawk looked good for her, but that i wouldn't wear   hair says alot i think with the long and short of it   i just have to remind myself that each of has our opinions on how we 'should' wear it   i still like my radical   i say radical for my father thinks i should wear it long   one of those who think i 'should' wear it a certain way   that a woman should look a certain way    thank goodness for freedom of expression and artists and youth who go against the norms   makes for great diversity in our world   i love it!....to hair or not to hair is the question    be free!   express yourself!

drained....

i sit quietly tonight with no music on or tv    i usually have at least one of those things on, but tonight i feel like no noise   just quiet   maybe the fireworks and all the hoopla wore me out a bit   i also realized i am drained from the constant heat above 95 degrees   as the days go on, i have little to no energy just to make it thru my work day   i sometimes become a bitch due to the unbearable heat   i'll pray the monsoon actually arrives this year with days of pouring buckets of rain   i think it starts within a few weeks   hurry up, i can't wait....yesterday i talked with my nephew for a moment   he's moving to New Mexico with his newlywed bride this coming weekend   for some reason he needs to stay with me for a few weeks   she's being assigned to Ft Bliss which is about 4hrs due south of here   once he arrives i'll get better answers   they met in military training which he, and maybe her, just finished last week i think   he's army guard, she's active   he will go active after 6months which is the required time he must wait   so i'll have company for a little while   shall be interesting   i really don't know him well and i'm not buying into all that my sister has said about him   i'll see for myself who he is, plus i'm thinking he's changed some for the better since joining the army guard and completing boot camp and his technical training   he's a security cop for them and that says something to me   we'll see   i'll take his company one day at a time   i'm thinking we'll have fun for the most part, or i at least hope so  we'll be just fine  .....well that's about the latest for now    i'm just gonna chill for the rest of the evening......

I am Spiritual

well yesterday i broke down and bought another Bruce Springsteen cd   actually this was 3cds in one   it's awesome   happy that i bought it   i have Streets of Philadelphia on another cd and when listening to it a few weeks ago, i can relate a bit with the song and my illness   there was a moment 6yrs ago i didn't recognize myself literally lookin at myself in the mirror   what a long road it's been   anyways, Bruce is just awesome   i've should have bought more of his music earlier, but life happens.....yesterday i also got the blues really bad   i needed so badly to talk with a friend, but chose not to call anyone   at the moment due to recent events, i'm a bit confused about friendships   what they are and what they're not   maybe i'm expecting too much, which i really don't think i am, but will discuss it with my therapist soon....today i'm feelin much better and am looking forward to the day   will bbq some ribs and burgers then visit with friends for the holiday   i will either meet up with Cindy, or be taking the neighbors to a free concert with fireworks this evening   last year i went to the free concert and it was a blast   i love concerts free or not   i love music!    i will clean the house a bit and finish one project i all but finished yesterday   i finally got my prints switched in my bedrooms and the second bedroom cleaned up a bit   it needs a paint job, but my whole house needs it   it'll be the first project to do once i retire, if i retire   i have second thoughts but think mostly it's fear talking  ....anyways, it's been a great 2days off thus far....everyone have a happy 4th!

p.s.   i had a spiritual dream again last nite   i finally figured out what those dreams have been trying to tell me...I am Spiritual...and need to get back to my daily practices, in touch with my Spirit and The One!

Happy 4th!

 

                                                                                                                          

 

         

What is your Inner Faerie?

You are the tree-loving faerie.  The Earth Faerie.  Nature is your friend, all the little animals are cute & cuddly, even those that bite.  You are a strong friend, people have a tendency to go to you when they are feeling sad.  You have a motherly instinct & always want to kiss away the tears.    .....(this fits me!)

http://quizilla.com/users/paintedongrin/quizzes/What's%20your%20inner%20Faerie%3F/

i got this from Jude   use the link above to check yourself out:-)....

"Better than the lottery"

    today i got some great news   but it's even Greater for the Lopez' & family    i was delivering my route today and saw Mr & Mrs Bonifacio Lopez at home   they offered me a soda in this hot weather as they usually do  i'm always grateful   well Boni said he had some great news to tell me and that "it's better than the lottery"   really?  i'm thinking   what could possibly be better than the lottery   so he wanted his wife Carmen to tell me the news  so we waited on her to come out into the garage   well i've known for as long as i've been on my route that their son died in Vietnam  they showed me his portrait in uniform and all his medals he had earned   what i didn't know i would learn today   their son's remains had never been found...Until NOW...they just learned that Robert C Lopez bones were found along with 11 other of his marine buddies in Vietnam   they're bringing them home  when is belongings were returned years ago, there was one boot missing   well they found the heal of the other boot   taking measurements of the one boot and comparing the two, the heal fit to a T   ....i gave Carmen a hug and told her that i was sooo happy for them   she replied, "it's a bit emotional, but we finally have closure"   i've never seen two people so happy like they were today   they showed me the shrine they put together, which i had seen part of, but today there was the Vietnam Memorial Wall print and an actuall photo of the wall with Robert's name listed   it was moving   there'll be local tv coverage either mon, tues or wed   there will be a private memorial next week   and then October 7, all 12 men will be buried and honored at Arlington National Cemetary in Washington   yes, 40yrs later the Lopez' have closure   their son is finally home  ...and most definitely, "better than the lottery".........this Independence day remember our Troops.....God Bless these 12 marines who served in 'Nam  God Bless our Troops   God Bless America!....i hope there's national tv coverage on their return.......

wheels!

Yep, I've got wheels!   yeah!   everything came together this morn   it may cost me tons in interest, but i've got wheels!   i'm ecstatic, but also tooo tired to enjoy the excitement   first i only had 6hrs sleep last nite which is a rare, rare, rare thing   so i'm feelin the drain now   to top it off it must have gotten 100 today again...anyways, now i'm in a family car   a Jeep Cherokee  perfect for me and my dogs since there wasn't a truck available   well they had one, but i didnt have enough down for that  my new used jeep is blue too   my fav color for vehicles, light blue   it looks new for a 98 and i'm a happy camper right now:-)   i won't go on a road trip this weekend nor buy any Springsteen cds for all my extra money went to my new wheels   i am sooo relieved  it was more stressful not having a car than having bills piled up to pay  that's a new one on me   the only thing not workin is the cruise control but i will have that fixed   i've learn to love my cruise control for freeway drivin back & forth to work as well as long road trips   drivin is less stressful with it  the tires look brand new also which means i won't have a flat in the near future-an experience with buying used vehicles   now i'll just work a bit more overtime to pay off a few bills   plus i was surprised today to discover my credit rating wasn't as bad as i originally thought   that makes me very happy too   still have some credit cards to pay off, but that will come soon enough  plus this is a car i can take weekend trips like to the four corners area and all around new mexico as i've been wanting   this is a very good thing in the long haul   the only bad thing that happened today was i almost got bit by a dog which came out of nowhere and from my backside   for the first in over a dozen years, i sprayed a dog   i sprayed him  he showed his teeth, he got it and he moved on fortunately  as much of a dog lover that i am, my job has taught me there are vicious dogs out there  i've been bitten twice in my 19yr career with the p.o.   i always use dog spray as the last resort unless the dog's immediately vicious as in this case   well all in all, i'm happy   i'm back in wheels, i'm back on 'my' postal route for good, my customers are happy    it is hot as hell, but i'm Happy!