but isn't this how it goes when a teen lives with you? i called Kyle and asked him to be on the road by 10pm it is for His Safety New Mexico is one of the worse states for drunken drivers i don't even allow myself to be out after certain hours of the nite and i want him home by 2am i've driven towork at 6:30am or so and come across drunk drivers weaving across the roads in front of me this doesn't include the numerous headon collisions that happen here because of drunk drivers...anyways, think i'll be awake for a little while i hope my book relaxes me enough that i can sleep....more gray hairs to come!
Sunday, July 31, 2005
Saturday, July 30, 2005
i woke at noon today after falling asleep very late i was totally wiped out it must have been the sleeping pill so my nephew and i had some time together today i paid some bills, then we did a little shopping i also found some money so he could go ahead to Ft Bliss (El Paso,TX) to see his fiance he left this evening and will return tomorrow evening it means i'm without a car, but that's ok hopefully soon his bonus from the Army will arrive and he can get his own car i don't know fully what some of the negative views have on my nephew, but he's really a good kid sometimes in the morn he just comes over and gives me a mornin hug he plays around and we laugh a lot together he has initiative and is willing to help out today while grocery shopping, i went to pick up the 52lb bag of dog food only for him to tell me to grab the cart that he would get the bag granted he has more to learn as we all do, but hey my family has him all wrong as far as i'm concerned i also know we're not all perfect and maybe they just have to much criticism and judgment on him well they need to take a hike! of course i'm far liberal than my family and don't expect everyone to walk a straight line, which no one ever can anyways i'm really enjoying my nephew much and getting a bit more attached to him he already has planned that he, his fiance and i are going to Oregon within a couple years to see my brother and his son i've been getting the feeling Kyle is really getting attached to me i really like that yet it's new to me as well really nice warm fuzzies though when he does move to TX with his fiance, i'm going to miss him he has all these plans for me and his 'family' to be this relationship is a very good thing...for both of us:-)
Friday, July 29, 2005
from the heat again temperatures rose again today and i feel like a mac truck hit me today i'm praying that it cools down tomorrow......my nephew says he's going to find me a boyfriend he'll be 25 i said NO WAY! LOL he has to be at least 30 if i'm going to do the Demi-Ashton thing......that's about all the news today except i'm learning more and more about this neighbor of mine more later on him......i'm too tired to write anything else tonite have a good one...
Thursday, July 28, 2005
i like the cologne better than the guy i ran into today i had to deliver mail to TD's Show Club today, a strip joint i believe usually i'm there when they're closed, but today was the first time it was operating i go in there and it's pitch black with a few spotlights all i'm trying to do is find the counter so i can drop the mail and haul a$$ out of there well i hear someone try and say something only to turn and there's this guy in a black shirt, to match the darkness and he has an attitude he looked and acted like a guy from the mafia i gave him the mail and left on the way out i'm thinking 'what do you think i'm going to do, sit and entertain myself?' p-l-e-a-s-e! i wouldn't even think about doing that this guy was sooo big it'd taken at least 6 cops to bring him down and do these guys have any brains? or are they just braun? anyways, it was a reminder of the truly bad guys in this world and the places that feed their attitudes...if only we could shut those places down!....otherwise, it was a good day at work...
Wednesday, July 27, 2005
this is a story i wrote a fellow j-lander who's experiencing tremendous physical pain at the moment and the loss of her dog thought i'd share it with you at her (Marti) suggestion should i share more of my previous adventures?
thought i'd write a brief story of my first backpacking trip into the Cascade Mountains located in Washington State actually to this day, it is my only backpacking trip in my life, but i hope to remedy that in the near future .....well here i am in Spokane, WA living with my friend Cindy she loves nature and decides to show me the North Cascades Highway not to far from the Canandian border she also decides to take me on my first backpacking trip now i can't remember if we hiked 5hrs or 5miles up to the top of the mountains, could be both hiking in the mountains is sooo beautiful among the pines, the waterfalls, the clear air and all of wildlife out there when hiking in in those high mtns, there comes a time when there are no more trees and you have nothing but mountain rocks it's barren, rugged and i understand why the mountain goats live up there ...which we did see climbing around once on top of the mountain and once on top we pitched a tent and spent the nite the view was immaculate, awesome, just out of this world so to speak we could see mountain tops for miles on end endless actually i only wanted to hike in further there is nothing but you, like a small ant, next to this humongous mountain it puts you in your place and life in perspective Nature is Bigger than you Nature is Bigger than us all the great things we do here in our small cities seem so limited to the Grand of Nature it's so serene, quiet, infinity in the mountains i know you know this Marti as much as you love the oceans and mountains too our hike was breath taking i feel that what is in Nature is truly God's Soul and that also lies within us....if the hurricanes have subsided, take a walk by the ocean to heal your grief Nature, God, will heal you, ...and remember Love , all that Love your dog gave you....with each new day, the sun shines brightly, the wind is at your back, the birds sing their glorius song and you will soon be back... Love kbear
Your Power Color Is Teal
At Your Highest:
You feel accomplished and optimistic about the future.
At Your Lowest:
You feel in a slump and lack creativity.
You tend to be many people's ideal partner.
How You're Attractive:
You make people feel confident and accepted.
Your Eternal Question:
"What Impression Am I Giving?"
Tuesday, July 26, 2005
well this evening, i'm going shoppin'...for a new 'Tude today didn't work out as i'd like i got up, got dressed for work and took my nephew to work all ready to head onto my job, but i remembered i needed to make a very important phone call and came home for the number i was still sleepy as hell, but got on the internet and it woke me up slowly but surely so anyways, i make my phone call and sit down to relax a bit before headed for the tough work day while sitting tears began flowing, just my depression, and i said Nope not today to work so i call in, but they call me and i think showed up at my door step needing me to work i layed in bed pretending not to hear them realizing i can't win with work whether i go there or not it's tough going to work depressed and then if i don't go, i feel guilty sometimes for not making it it's a no win cylce it's definitely time to retire it's work just to get to work and keep going there, no wonder i need a new attitude to keep me going so i've decided to go window shoppin to see if there are some new cliches out there i might be able to use if i don't find one, i may use 'No Fear' as my new motto it puts me into an adventerous feeling and maybe that's all i need to tackle the job and the world again and with my nephew maybe i can pick up something from him and his friends which just reminds me where is my 'No Fear' poncho some young guy gave me i need to look for it!...so i'm off to look for it while waiting for my nephew to finish his phone call he' going to hang out with me at the mall i also got out the chess set i haven't played in about 20yrs so he'll probably beat my butt, but hey, it'll be fun! off for my new 'Tude!
Monday, July 25, 2005
1. Who was your first best friend? How old were you when you two met? Are you still in regular contact with each other? my first best friend was Avril we met in 5th grade, about 11yrs old we are still in contact with each other but just once a year at Christmas this year as i return to the midwest i plan on seeing her again after 20yrs or so...
2. Other than the "Saturday Six," what weekly or daily memes do you play most often? (Please give a link to that journal.)none yet
3. Which of the following likely has the bigger mess underneath it: your stove, your refrigerator, your couch or your bed? i'd say that's a tie between my bed and the couch that's where all the dog hairs go as well as all the dog toys end up
4. Take this quiz: How long does MSN think you'll live? Then take this one: How long does Blogthings think you'll live? MSN thinks i'll live til 102...Blogthings, 79...averaged out = 90
5. Do either or both of these motivate you to make any changes in your lifestyle? no not really there's not much more i could do except stop smoking i'll work on that
6. Name five things you would like to do by December 31, 2005. retire, visit family, return to school, go to the Grand Canyon again, be debt free
Sunday, July 24, 2005
Saturday, July 23, 2005
Friday, July 22, 2005
Thursday, July 21, 2005
Wednesday, July 20, 2005
Monday, July 18, 2005
Sunday, July 17, 2005
it's sunday morn all is quiet except for my kids barking a bit, but that's normal around here i was hoping to sleep in late after being out til midnight last nite friday nite we didnt' make it to the movie, but we made it last nite i was planning on seeing the latest Batman flick, but the neighbors wanted to get out last nite and so we went to the dollar movie it was Lil Angel's birthday yesterday, turning 3, and i thought we'd see something she could watch like 'The Pacifier' well her father, Justin, wanted to see this movie, 'Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy' frankly i thought the movie sucked myself there were a few comical lines in it, other than that it was a senseless movie with no plot really i think it was made by the British with their sense of humor i didn't get it it was different, but i could have passed on this movie and Justin actually fell asleep in the movie ...anyways, it was an interesting evening the way Justin and my nephew Kyle carried on, i felt like it was over 20yrs ago when I was out & about with friends i'm getting old i need to call Cindy, someone closer to my age, actually a little older i can't remember the last time i was with some rowdy people it was different and a bit fun too glad everyone enjoyed themselves it made me realize my life has been turned upside down i'm accustom to nice quiet times at home or at the movies, not wild crazy people yep i'm old....anyways, Kyle's asleep and i'm enjoying a nice quiet moment in my house since over a week today will be my day in the mountains despite having everyone go with me i'll find a way to have my solitude and reflection time somehow, someway and i'm praying it'll be at least 10degrees cooler in the mountains...life is about change, but i wasn't expecting this...
Friday, July 15, 2005
Thursday, July 14, 2005
and another hot day....the G movie is better than WWF...not sure i can get accustom to all this G tv now i have a slice of what parents go thru it took me years to finally adjust to 'real' life, this is like going back in time it's only temporary i must remind myself....well tomorrow is payday yay! and i've spent $50 at a garage sale that hasn't happened yet one of my customers showed me their stuff for their sale they sat aside about $50 of stuff for me i did really good i got a drill, a sander, electric staple gun, a camping stove, a camping heater, a radio all for 5 bucks a piece i couldn't pass them up i also picked up a few other items but i think i got a great deal on all of it the good news is i came home to my pay stub and had the money to pay for it i've cut my shopping to yard/garage sales but still spend quite a bit there's sooo many good deals out here ....well the clouds rolled in and it appeared as if it was going to pour down rain, but no such luck hopefully it'll stay dry enough that i can tar my roof a bit from leaking once i get the roof fixed i can redo my ceiling in my bedroom where it leaked this spring really bad lots of home projects i'm looking forward to once retired my neighbor will assist or actually do the work i'll pay him a decent amount as well once i remodel the house a bit, then i'm going shopping in the mountains for another home it'll take a year or so, but it will be worth it all in time everything will come together in the meantime, i'm enjoying each day as it comes today i chatted with Kyle a bit about going places within New Mexico he's definitely all for it, so i'll invite them along probably for the majority of my trips it'll be fun i desire to revisit White Sands again and i have yet to get to Carlsbad Caverns which is in southern NM and near Nicole's fort for now, i patiently wait for the next 2 months to unfold when i'll know about my VA disability and postal retirement honestly, sometimes i'm impatient for it all one day at time, one step at a time....Life is still good!
Wednesday, July 13, 2005
when Kyle arrived i told him there were 3 rules in my house:
1.Don't lose Charlie
2. follow rule #1
3. Don't lose Charlie
well this evening, Charlie escaped him this evening right after i got home i actually started laughing but i knew Kyle would get him he immediately jumped the fence too chasing Charlie faster than i could ever be now he really knows how Charlie is, the heartaches and headaches of my life is Charlie but i love him bunches...anyways, it hasn't rained yet but it has been threatening with dark cloud cover humidity is still in the air hitting my joints painfully and my right wrist which i injured a dozen years ago rollerskating i had to put a brace on it today i know i'm getting older, but my body is falling apart like i'm old....well the event of the day, i got mooned today while delivering mail i haven't been moon since my 20s and forgot they even do those things this was a kid about 12yrs old who did it, but i ignored him and pretended i didn't see him he had a blast tho first time ever on the job i've been mooned you think you've seen it all and then you're reminded about all there is and then some i really need my mountains now, lol 2 more days of work and i'll be there it's been a pretty good week with all the exciting news i told my nephew to make sure he buys his wife, mother to be, at least a single rose for becoming pregnant it's a special occasion just want to teach him a few things on how to be a loving husband and a better man whatever i can think of while he's here he didn't have a father figure while growing up my mother raised him and his father disappeared before he was born i think i hope one day he finds a father figure for himself he would be really good for him i think Tjnya raised her sons by herself and i applaud all women who raise their children single handlely, and men too i've seen some great kids come out of single parents....anyways, i know Kyle will do just fine i can tell he's a sensitive guy i know me at his age still neededsome guidance ...at my age i still need some guidance at times anyways, life is good the best is yet to come...
Tuesday, July 12, 2005
Monday, July 11, 2005
Sunday, July 10, 2005
Saturday, July 9, 2005
3 mirrors in my home....sure i could give up a mirror, But i know my hair
2. What online abbreviation annoys you the most and why? http...is it really necessary for the network
3. What do you hate the most in this world?
hate is a four letter word = ignorance
4. You decide to go to your next high school reunion. What do you anticipate would be the thing most people said about you behind your back? look at her very short hair ... is she gay?
5. You learn that because of some galactic mixup in fate itself, you must restart your life tomorrow in a new place. You will emerge as a person with a unique past and won't seem out of the ordinary to those in the new place. You will retain the experiences and memories of your past, but the people you are closest to will believe that you are dead and gone and you would be prohibited from contacting them. Where would you go and why?
Nature of course i can easily blend in there
6. What are you most passionate about in this moment of your life and why? retirement.....that sums it up in one word
I got this quiz from The Daily Snooze journal i took it actually last month and revisited tonight after the movie Albus Dumbledore was my answer:
Strong & powerful you admirably defend your world and your charges against those who would seek to harm them. However, sometimes you can fail to do what you must because you care too much to cause suffering.
back with the link to this quiz in a second...
it was a fun test...try it if you'd like....
i got this reading from The Daily Snooze journal http://journals.aol.com/olddog299/DailySnooze/ it's an article written by an Iranian, Amir Taheri who explains why the terrorist did/do the bombings it was educational for me thought you might like to read it here's a direct link to the article
Friday, July 8, 2005
Thursday, July 7, 2005
tonight last nite i remembered about the Lopez' tv coverage regarding their son being brought home from Vietnam i thought i had missed it tonight i had the tv on for the first time this week and they advertised the story for the 10 o'clock news....anyways, they did a great coverage on him and his family i'm happy i got to see it will let them know manana that i got to see it they still miss him, but Carmen is very happy to have him home they will attend the services in Arlington National Cemetary in October it was a beautiful story! God Bless Them.....
on a personal note...i remembered to pick up my ribbon magnets for supporting our troops and one for MIA/POW, you're not forgotton, for my new car already had put the USA and New Mexico flags on the car....i'm also ready to retire yesterday the job initially sucked this morn, but i walked off the aggravation and anger delivering my mail that's one thing i always love about my walking route can easily walk off stress and frustrations from the office the day turned out pretty good overall all once out of the office a customer even gave me a belated christmas gift it was so thoughtful of her and any of my customers that do appreciate and remember me during the holidays and throughout the year with water, sodas, and sometimes a meal wonderful people on my route i am blessed in so many ways sometimes, it's overwhelming at times too.....
Wednesday, July 6, 2005
Tuesday, July 5, 2005
Monday, July 4, 2005
well yesterday i broke down and bought another Bruce Springsteen cd actually this was 3cds in one it's awesome happy that i bought it i have Streets of Philadelphia on another cd and when listening to it a few weeks ago, i can relate a bit with the song and my illness there was a moment 6yrs ago i didn't recognize myself literally lookin at myself in the mirror what a long road it's been anyways, Bruce is just awesome i've should have bought more of his music earlier, but life happens.....yesterday i also got the blues really bad i needed so badly to talk with a friend, but chose not to call anyone at the moment due to recent events, i'm a bit confused about friendships what they are and what they're not maybe i'm expecting too much, which i really don't think i am, but will discuss it with my therapist soon....today i'm feelin much better and am looking forward to the day will bbq some ribs and burgers then visit with friends for the holiday i will either meet up with Cindy, or be taking the neighbors to a free concert with fireworks this evening last year i went to the free concert and it was a blast i love concerts free or not i love music! i will clean the house a bit and finish one project i all but finished yesterday i finally got my prints switched in my bedrooms and the second bedroom cleaned up a bit it needs a paint job, but my whole house needs it it'll be the first project to do once i retire, if i retire i have second thoughts but think mostly it's fear talking ....anyways, it's been a great 2days off thus far....everyone have a happy 4th!
p.s. i had a spiritual dream again last nite i finally figured out what those dreams have been trying to tell me...I am Spiritual...and need to get back to my daily practices, in touch with my Spirit and The One!
Sunday, July 3, 2005
You are the tree-loving faerie. The Earth Faerie. Nature is your friend, all the little animals are cute & cuddly, even those that bite. You are a strong friend, people have a tendency to go to you when they are feeling sad. You have a motherly instinct & always want to kiss away the tears. .....(this fits me!)
i got this from Jude use the link above to check yourself out:-)....
Saturday, July 2, 2005
today i got some great news but it's even Greater for the Lopez' & family i was delivering my route today and saw Mr & Mrs Bonifacio Lopez at home they offered me a soda in this hot weather as they usually do i'm always grateful well Boni said he had some great news to tell me and that "it's better than the lottery" really? i'm thinking what could possibly be better than the lottery so he wanted his wife Carmen to tell me the news so we waited on her to come out into the garage well i've known for as long as i've been on my route that their son died in Vietnam they showed me his portrait in uniform and all his medals he had earned what i didn't know i would learn today their son's remains had never been found...Until NOW...they just learned that Robert C Lopez bones were found along with 11 other of his marine buddies in Vietnam they're bringing them home when is belongings were returned years ago, there was one boot missing well they found the heal of the other boot taking measurements of the one boot and comparing the two, the heal fit to a T ....i gave Carmen a hug and told her that i was sooo happy for them she replied, "it's a bit emotional, but we finally have closure" i've never seen two people so happy like they were today they showed me the shrine they put together, which i had seen part of, but today there was the Vietnam Memorial Wall print and an actuall photo of the wall with Robert's name listed it was moving there'll be local tv coverage either mon, tues or wed there will be a private memorial next week and then October 7, all 12 men will be buried and honored at Arlington National Cemetary in Washington yes, 40yrs later the Lopez' have closure their son is finally home ...and most definitely, "better than the lottery".........this Independence day remember our Troops.....God Bless these 12 marines who served in 'Nam God Bless our Troops God Bless America!....i hope there's national tv coverage on their return.......