Balloon Fiesta

ok here it is what i've been dying to show you....these pics are about 15-17yrs old but in still good shape   they are of the Balloon Fiesta held here annually in albuquerque, nm in the month of October   It is the Hot Air Balloon Fiesta where hundreds and hundreds of hot air balloons rise every mornin, weather permitting, to the dawn of the sunrise   this is an amazing experience in all its wonder   thousands of people attending but it's like being on 2 football stadiums so you don't feel the crowd so much   or you're too enthralled in the beauty and music of it all   the music being the aaawwws and oooohhhs and the sound of the air fillin the balloons   i hope these pics give you an idea of this great event   i still love going although i haven't made it every year   when you're down on the field, the sky fills up with all the colors and balloons   when you get to the Bear, it is a hot air balloon   i included a few more special shape balloons that attend also   there is one day set aside called Special Shapes Rodeo   the event lasts for about 10days with mass ascension on weekends   if you're ever in albq, try to come the first weekend of October for this fiesta...ENJOY!

rescue mission

as i sat here tonight reading others' journals, everyone had a hell of a day today except Dona   Dona's journal is Blue Skies...and has a link to a great laugh today to another journal entry   go there if you need a laugh....i needed the laugh after my day today   when it rains it pours  after the nightmare last night, i discovered i was out of money already and i just got paid friday   boy did that tell me how bad i was over the weekend   i haven't spent my paycheck in a couple days in years, actually since my psychosis  i really fell apart...now the day continues...my boss calls me out on the route and tells me i have a flat tire  O Great!  well they took it to get it fixed and it was nonfixable  there's a whole within one inch of the side therefore it cannot be patched....Russ to the rescue:-)  thank goodness   he came down after work and loaned me the money for a new tire   it was only last week i had used the spare for another tire was slowly leaking and nonfixable   i hadn't had the time to replace the tire, nor did i feel i needed to do so quickly   well while we waited for the tire to be mounted, he took us to dinner   it was good to see him and the food was really good too   Serfino's is the restraunt, a mexican place   one i'd call a hole in the wall because it's not a fancy place, simple with great food at an inexpesive price   you get this humongous plate of food for like $6   it was delicious   company was great too   he's a sweetheart   i need to figure out how to sweep him off his feet before he moves on elsewhere, lol   ...we got the tire and went back and he helped me put it back on   i learned more about changing a tire which i have yet to do  God and Russ were to my rescue today!  Thank you both!   now i'm just gonna chill for a little bit before doing some cleaning which i have yet to do, dagnabbit!    I hope everyone has a better day manana....until then   take care

tuesday mornin confusion

Good mornin yall   it's tuesday morn and my confusion was created out of a bad dream   i made a note on it so i can discuss it with my therapist in a couple weeks   i realized this morn after the dream that i think when i was in the gay life it created more confusion for me adding to the confusion from childhood   in my young adult life, 18-30, i was in the gay life   i thought i was gay, but always questioned it   i dated men initially, but found myself with a woman  anyways, when alone i always questioned as to whether i was gay or not   about the time i was ready to date men again, my illness took hold   so i didn't date for a decade and then started dating men   i'm not confused anymore as to my sexuality, but sometimes i have this re-occuring dream which i won't go into details because it would take another whole entry   it relates to me being 'gay' sorta, but i know that is not Truth for me anymore   i've never been happier with a guy than i ever was in the gay life   i just wasn't happy there   i knew this years ago before my illness   now i can just be karen and not have that expected 'role' put upon me....so anyways, i really didn't begin this entry to indulge into that   i'm happier now than i've ever been in life   ...what this entry is for i wanted to share something from a book i've been reading a bit , Courage  The Joy of Living Dangerously, by Osho   i don't know who Osho is but i picked this book up in our church bookstore   his introductory totally blew me away and i thought this guy was crazy, but as i've dived into the book he has some great insights    here is a tidbit which i really love:

"The way of the heart is the way of courage.  It is to live in insecurity; it is to live in love, and trust; it is to move in the unknown.  It is leaving the past and allowing the future to be.  Courage is to move on dangerous paths......Heart is the future; heart is always the hope, heart is always  somewhere in the future. Head thinks about the past; heart dreams about the future.....My responsibility is toward my heart, not toward anybody else in the world.  So is your responsibility only toward your own being."

what igot out of that was to live with your heart   allow your heart to be your guide and direction    for the heart always knows the 'right' path for each of us individually   if i listen to my heart in lieu of analyzing everything, i'll know the answers   it is my head, analyzing, that gets me into trouble   the heart is the soul, your spirit connected to the one Spirit (God) who guides you   so this tells me to listen to my Heart!    how simple this is   ....this book is more than i thought   i'm glad i picked it up:-)

affirmation for the day:   On Living in the Present

I live in the urrent moment, releasing the past to its place in memory and focusing on today, fresh and new.  Now is all there is.  I recognize the goodness of God in the now moment and rejoice.  I accept the many blessings of each moment as I live it.

more photos...

hey everyone,  a few more photos i wanted to share for now   #1 is my friend Tjnya and Tabou @ 7weeks old   #2 is me and Tabou about 12wks old  #3 are the Montyoa-Martinez twins  the one on the left is spitting image of her mom & grandpa  the one on the right is the spittin image of her father   they are twins born on my postal route a couple months ago  #4/5 are photos of kris' bush another customer of mine  i thought it had photography potential and i was trying to capture the color and delicacy of nature....well i just got angry with my dogs   one of them chewed on the 8x10 photo i had matted ready to give to my therapist   this is a chapter for 'murder she wrote' which my dogs do write from time to time  fortunately i have another photo and the mat is inexpensive at walmart     i love my kids, but they are kids/dogs   means i must go to walmart tonight anyways   i was already to chill in the house tonight and get some things done like ripping up some carpet tonight.  well i'll be awake for awhile   let me get to the store for i need a business envelope also...or i can wait til tomorrow evening   i go to the VA tuesday too....grrrrrr!   o well life is better   dont' think i'll drop college afterall, but i realized i needed to let go the class at church at least   this last week has been an eye opener for me....anyways, btw, my gap in my teeth is temporary   working on the 5k to fix that bridge, lol   well hope all is well with all my j-landers   take care   more soon...

Black&White Photos

Ok guys   this is the last set of photos for tonight   these are black&white so don't change your dial   i love black & white photography   i'm a big Ansel Adams fan every since i saw some of his actual photos in a musuem display   (i also happened to be taking a b&w photo class at Boise State Univ)  anyways, if you ever get the chance to see some of his photos, please do   each and every one i saw took my breath away again, again & again   i'd love to be the next Ansel, but i have quite a ways to go   ok, photo #1 is from Bandelier Nat'l Park   this park is near Santa Fe about 1 1/2hours from my house  i'll include a series on that park later with more photos   it is an ancient ruin site and the ancient ones lived in caves and other adobe made homes    more on that later ...photo #2  is spring budding  #3 daises i believe & #4 a tree atop the Sandia Mtn which our city sits at its base  Tj liked that photo so i included it.....honestly i think all my photos look better in print than on here, but i hope you can get an idea anyways   i'm just sooo critical of my photography so i'm not one to be judging   anyways, i'm happy with them all   it's getting to be the hobby i've always wanted to be   eventually i'll take more photography classes for tips on improving my photos   i enjoy it with a passion   only reading comes second to it...ok i need to chill some more tonight with other things   take care  God bless!

Grand Canyon #2

O righty then!   i've found a new toy:-)    i'm sooooooo happy!   i went to kinko's this morn not thinking i had a scan on my new printer   so i've been scanning my photos and here are a few more of the grand canyon   photo #1 is actually sunrise at the GC.  #2 is the gc after the sun has risen  it gets hazey quick once the sun is up at the canyon  #3 is another blue gc before sunset...more photos to come. this is exciting   i love photography and with this pics from a regular 35mm camera and film, i can see how digital photography would be better on the computer   maybe down the road i'll get that digital camera, but right now i love the traditional film quality of photos for printing   life is sooo exciting right now...today i reluctantly decided to drop college for the moment   it's like a part-time job even though i love it  i work 6days a week at the p.o. therefore only having sundays off   that only gives me one day for cleaning, yard work, laundry, shopping, church and any funtime i desire to have   too much work and very little play is not a balance   i will however be back in school once i retire which i'm working on the paperwork at this moment   now i can enjoy school, my photography, dates with Russ-the new guy in my life, and church as well as the dozen or more books for pleasure reading to do   also i have home projects like painting, landscaping, building a dog run and a new gate for my fence and other stuff to do   but most of all, i'm hittin' the road jack   i'm going to start taking saturday overniters in other areas of new mexico and the borders of arizona and colorado   there's so much i need to catch up in my travels for i have done so little since my illness began over a decade ago   now i'm healthy and happy and ready to roll    and i love that i've discovered this photo stuff in my journal   means i can share my adventures with all of you this summer   in the meantime, i'm going to dig up some 'old' photos if i can find them of our Balloon Fiesta which takes place in October   Up to 1000 hot air balloons have participated in the 10day fiesta held annually    it's just awesome and beautiful!   i'm ready to share new mexico and its beauty with everyone!...anyways,  more photos on the way:-)  I HOPE YOU ALL ENJOY!

photo # 1

well, here is my first photo installed   i guess i'm going to need Dona's help anyways on how to input photos into my journal-yikes!   anyways,  i call this Blue Grand Canyon   i took this shot about a half hour before sunset   it was a cloudy day too but i liked the mood this shot portrays...i hope you enjoy it while i figure out how to do this differently......it would be better viewed if you use the 'view larger' tab....more soon   take care