Monday, February 28, 2005

a good day with my therapist

I LOVE MY THERAPIST!!! it was our monthly meeting and boy does she have me pegged or what   think she knows me better than i know myself sometimes   i started the day being a bit down,  ok more than a bit   i was beginning to pick up some when i had her appointment   she finished picking me up and it made my day   we talked a little about my friend who hadn't been chatting with me and that scenario (btw, she did contact me last night)   we talked about my philosophy in life and how it clashes  with my workplace   but my philosophy probably would clash with any work place   i believe in smelling the roses every day, hug your kids and pets and hubby or wife or mate, feel the warmth of the sun and the caress of the wind on your face    take care of yourself and your family,   everything else will take care of itself     Life is really simple    enjoy it simply    no better way therapist proposed a question    she asked if it's difficult for people to have a relationship with me    i honestly didn't know, but will think about it    maybe it is for some, and not so for others     i alwas thought it was easy for people to have friendships or intimate relationships with me, but i could be wrong, very wrong     i'm not worried about it either way     i know i am a compassionate, understanding human who's heart goes out to all really     as kathleen mentioned (my therapist) , my boundaries may be blurred a bit from not learning those from my youth    i also recognized that sometimes i'll overreact with my friends unintentionally (as i did recently)    i know i'm not perfect and wouldn't want to be either   i really just want to be human     i'm learning and relearning everyone has 'different' friendships    what is ok with some friends, is not ok with others     and all that is ok     life is about learning, growing and changing     i welcome growth and change     ......the past couple months i haven't been my best    my blues have really been kickin me in the butt    i've been barely holding myself together    kathleen and i also talked about that    what we discussed i will take to my psychriatrist who i see next monday    think we came up with a solution to handle these blues that i feel are connected to menopause     i've been checking out the possible side affects of hormone replacement therapy and i don't like the looks of them   one of them being dementia really turned me off to it    a co-worker has suggested acupuncture but that can rack up some dough each month     herbs are out for they could really mess up my meds and my head       sooooo,   i'm going to ask if we can increase my antidepressant just for those 2weeks a month that i'm buried in depression    i'll see what dr. fallon has to say (my shrink)    she'll know     she's been with me for 6yrs just like kathleen    they both take good care of me    i'm very grateful for their presence in my life    they hold me together when i can't........anyways, it was a great day at the therapist's office    Life is good again!    it actually is good all the time except when the blues have me down-ugh!     o well,   i'm fine    i have things to do, people to meet, places to go!    and this week i start school again with the univ of phoenix    i'm excited!    at last, the road again to my degree!    i can hardly wait! was a beautiful day out today   in the clear sky, i saw the sandia mtns afar and was reminded it is all worth living        thank you God!    thank you me!   God bless you all!


1 comment:

delela1 said...

Yes it was a beautiful day today!

Thought you might like to know that you were an indirect inspiration for my "Open Letter..." entry the other day.  You brought the Serenity Prayer back to my mind, and in doing so, it led me to write that entry.  Each day holds new surprises...each day is a new beginning.  You never know just how you will touch another person.  ~Dona