Wednesday, April 27, 2005

James my Love

i sit quietly , resting contemplating and i need to study    yet at the moment my mind is on my conversation with James this evening    i had to call   i needed questions answered   mostly just to know what happened back in november when he cut me totally off from his life....he's back now   only a few weeks ago...but finally we are at an understanding    i had hurt him unknowingly, but mostly everyone around him was hurting him   he and i really misunderstood each other regarding a money issue, but all is well now   neither of us are angry with the other     and tho we will never be together as lovers or husband & wife,  we are friends and love each other deeply    i've learned in the past few weeks since his return, he is a complex man    i know we all have our complexities, but i think because he's dying of cancer adds to his   i've learned greatly from this relationship with him    for one, there are men like minded as i when it comes to relationships and beliefs our life    the simple pleasures we most treasure    he's a beautiful man inside and out    i'll treasure him forever.....for now i will be there for him anyway i can , and he the same with me although he's in Houston, TX and i here in New Mexico.....i will meet him one day   hopefully this summer with the trip to Ft Worth to see some family    i think Houston is only 4hrs away from there    I will pray that all the money will come together for this to happen........God Bless him with all the love he so deserves!

affirmation for the day:   When I am having difficulties seeing the answers I need, I open my heart and mind to Infintie Wisdom.  Within me are the knowledge, understanding, and wisdom of all time, for the Infinite is within.  I call upon it and it always answers.  I am never without the guidance and wisdom I need.

Infinte can mean God.

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