Sunday, April 24, 2005

Taking a risk!

i lay awake relishing in the possibilities of what may come   it's been years, six and more, since being in a relationship   it scares the hell out of me yet who knows what will happen  does not matter.......my mind wanders....i'm taking a risk at this moment   i haven't in awhile   my mind wandered to my mental illness and i remembered at times i sooo desire for people to understand how far i've come and where i've come from   so here is the risk   i'm giving you a hint of my illness   i won't tell u mydiagnosis but i will reveal some hint   have you ever seen the movie "A Beautiful Mind" w/Russell Crowe?  i'm not schizophrenia as he was, however, i experienced some of what he went thru in the movie   his 'shadows' never went away    my medication takes all of that away and more   it's only depression that i still experience despite medication....it's been a long journey home.   P.S>   all this means is i'm officially 'crazy'=LOL   i'm fully sane with my meds, don't worry please!

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Sweetie, I have a mental illness as well.  I suffer from anxiety
and depression and have for many years.  Meds help a great
deal, although I do have my dark times.
I've been reading some of your entries.  You write very well!
Glad I stumbled across your journal.  I will definitely be back!
~Connie

journals.aol.com/indigosunmoon/ThoughtSalad

Anonymous said...

we are all crazy..... so nice to visit your journal. judi

Anonymous said...

...as Judi said......it's offical we are all a lil "something"..

Elizabeth

Anonymous said...

So glad I came across your journal via Candace. I have an adult son who is Bipolar with psychosis. He is divorced with 3 children. He has been on meds for 19 months. He slept for the first year and now is returning to his old self. He tried meds before but always went off of them. My husband and I teach 8 week workshops for the friends and family of the mentally ill. So many times we have found, their families abandon them.  I have suffered depression and anxiety for many years and am meds for that. What I am saying is this: We are all people behind the labels. We need to bust these stigmas associated with these illnesses. We need healthcare for those who are disabled from these illnesses. Did you know that one can NOT get healthcare at all unless you are employed in a large group? I've ranted on, way too long. I admire you for your openness. There is a large community of love and support here in J-land. "I no longer fear the storms, as I learn to sail my own ship"  Much love and support ,Anne

Anonymous said...

Welcome!!!
V

Anonymous said...

And I thought mental illness was such an exclusive club. : )
I have PTSD and have fought depression for years.  I don't take medications anymore but would not have got where I am today without them.
Candace

Anonymous said...

K-sometimes the risk reveals just what you need.   You have come a long way.  Be happy...and like judi and e both said, we are all a little bit 'crazy.'

~Dona

Anonymous said...

I have a friend who is bipolar and when she is on meds were fine but when she gets off and drinks...I stay away...shes mean to me..
We have been friend about 15 years...
Donna in TEXAS
I have suffered with depression for years I understand somewhat